I Remember Your Smile

By Sunday, May 13, 2012

Your smile, it still lingers in my mind. 

We've all lost someone we love at some point in our lives. The people we thought we could never live without. At one snap of a finger, they may be gone - worst, we may be gone.

I've lost so many special people already: my dad, aunt, uncle, grandfathers, grandmother. And whenever I think of them, I can't help but shed a tear. Those memories with them are still fresh in my mind. When I think of how miserable my life is without them, I could hardly even think how it is like for my mother. She lost her beloved husband, her caring sister, her both parents. All she got is me. Should I say, all we got are each other. 

The nasheed by Zain Bhikha is one of the most special nasheeds for me. It tells exactly how I felt when I lost my father. It was painful. It has been four years but I still really long for him. When I see people who have their fathers by their side, I sometimes feel a guilt of jealousy. How I wish I have someone who protects me because I am his most precious jewel. However, life is like that. We have to accept. And yes, I have long accepted the fact that my father is gone. But there is that strand of memory that I still cling to. And I will forever do. Because I know, one day, I will meet my whole family. One day. In Shaa Allaah. We will meet in one place - Jannah. 

By then, I will continue to live on. I will make my mom happy no matter what happens. Because she is everything I got. And no. I don't celebrate mother's day. I think it is too shallow to celebrate for a day only and go back to normal days after. Everyday is a blessing that I still have my mom be my side, vice versa. Everyday is our day together. EVERYDAY!

Thanking my mom means everything. But she is not fond of the restaurant food because she is vegetarian. Our only bonding is roaming around the BookSale and Fabric section of Gaisano Mall Iligan. We both are into fashion and homemade apparels. That's why when we go out, we are always to be found in any fabric section of any mall or department store.

How do you bond with your loved ones? How do you remember those who already passed away? 

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  1. Wa alaykum salam. You write so well, Kai. i am a muslim too and i can feel the passion behind all your write ups. Good work in here sis.



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